Insistent Stupidity

Many of us have beloved pets – dogs, cats, horses, parrots, goats – that are like children to us. Dogs, in particular, hold a place near and dear to our hearts. They offer an endless source of love, loyalty and entertainment. Ah, the canine tales we could share. How about the time my husband BBQ’d six filet mignon steaks for dinner that accidentally slid off the platter and into our dog’s ready, willing and wide-open mouth? But I digress…

My cousins, Rebecca and Scott, recently visited relatives who live on a large ranch. Their hosts invited them to bring their dog, Cookie, along.

Rebecca explained, “Before our daughter was born, Cookie was our only child. She is the world’s most sweetest, loveable and cuddly dog. Our generous hosts had two dogs and plenty of space. We thought bringing Cookie was a great idea…until another guest, Anne, proceeded to tell us that Cookie was overweight. Anne compared Cookie to the ranch dogs who were thin and athletic. She thought our dog was 13 years old. When we told Anne that Cookie was only 3 1/2, Anne acted surprised and insisted we put Cookie on a diet right away. She said our dog was obviously lazy. I got so angry! I wanted to tell Anne to look in a mirror before making comments like that. Didn’t she know our dog was part of our family? Insulting Cookie was like insulting one of our kids! I laughed it off and told Anne, “She’s a city dog, and she looks like the other dogs at the dog park. Anne asked, ‘Then are all the dogs overweight where you live?’ I walked away at that point.”

Take note that Rebecca wanted to respond differently to Anne’s reckless remarks, but did not. What does that indicate? Rebecca actually exercised thought before she spoke! How refreshing! Rebecca, an aware person, did not want to say anything she might later regret or that would lower her to the level of the stuper (short yet again, for stupid person).

Did Anne actually believe she was being helpful? Was this a case of well-meaning stupidity? I think that, in a rickety, irksome way, Anne believed she was doing a favor. It’s amazing how many stupers dispense unsolicited advice which they believe another party needs to hear. Anne was certain Cookie was fat. By relentlessly preying on Cookie’s weight, Anne avoided the issue of her own weight problem. Perhaps Anne was on a diet herself at that very moment which she believed made her an instant diet guru. Or maybe she’d unsuccessfully tried to dole out weight advice to humans and now turned her attention to unsuspecting canine owners.

We’ve already discussed, in previous posts, the prominent place criticism of others holds for stupers. When a stuper readies, aims and fires, it’s best to take cover. Kind of like an air raid drill. Do not waste your energy fighting back by trying to talk sense. Do not argue. Rebecca handled her stupid encounter well by refusing to acknowledge the hurtful remarks. If you feel you must respond, make it short and sweet, then head for the hills.

When my kids were tots, an aunt insisted on giving me constant fashion advice. What nanny-free mom is going to don Dolce & Gabbana duds when there are grubby hands and candy-stained lips at large? Finally, this stupid aunt lost interest in me and turned to my husband. Telling me I couldn’t dress myself was one thing, but deciding I couldn’t dress my husband either…everything that had been simmering inside detonated into a few choice words until my uncle hooked the top of a cane around Aunty’s neck and dragged her away.

Take note also that there is an age factor regarding stupidity. I don’t pick on the very young or the very old; they have a special pass to speak their minds freely without necessarily thinking first. What the young haven’t learned, the old have earned. (Can you tell I just made that up this very second?). My criticism-wielding aunt was only a year older than me, so she fell headlong into the stuper category. 

Stupers criticize others to avoid taking a long, hard look at themselves. Since they are satisfied with what little they know, there’s no attempt to fill up the practically vacant mind. It must echo dreadfully loud in there.

As the great thinker, Albert Einstein, once said, “Thinking is hard work; that’s why so few do it.”

Keep on thinking!


One Response to “Insistent Stupidity”

  1. Kathy says:

    Relative stupidity:
    I can relate to this. Funny, I have a sister-in-law, and she acts and says things just like your aunt.
    Do you think maybe they are related?

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